So, you know that job interview I was all nervous about? Well, I didn't get the job. And you know what? I'm more disappointed about it than I thought I would be. It wasn't my dream job. Not even close. But for some reason I'm really bummed.
What I can't seem to figure out is why. Is it because I am now left with the question swirling in my head “Why didn't they like me?" or because I really wanted to dip my toes back into the professional waters? It's almost going to be a year since I reluctantly left my position as a marketing professional and I cannot even believe how fast time flies. Its scary.
As I was going through the process I kept thinking to myself, am I ready for this? Could I really stomach putting the little man back into daycare again just like that? How would he handle it? How would I handle it? Maybe I'm not ready yet. Maybe we aren't ready yet.
But not getting the job has made me realize that I am ready. Because even though it was just a contract, I really think I was excited to start another chapter in my life. One that came with a paycheck for all my hard work and creativity and not just pizza.
And I think the little man is ready as well. I feel so guilty and sad for him having to hang out with just me all day. I really want to get him into a school or program where he can play and socialize with other kids. He is almost 2 and he is at an age where he is just so into what other kids are doing. And its really hard when only one of my girlfriends is a stay at home mom, so there really isn't much in the way of playdates that come our way.
So, I'm trying to use this as a learning experience. To tell myself that if I didn't get the job, it just wasn’t meant to be – at least not this time. To tell myself that there will be other opportunities that will come my way and become even more determined to get that next one.
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